Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Scenes From An Idiot's Marriage

The phone rang Sunday morning as we were getting ready for church.

I answered it. Turns out one of the ladies from church wanted to talk to my wife.

"Honey," I called up the stairs. "It's Nelsonia Depew* on the phone."

"Oh, from church?" she asked.

"No, it's adult film superstar Nelsonia Depew," I replied.

As my buddy, Bernie says, "How does she stand it?"

*Note: This is not the woman's name, but it is almost as distinctive.

7 Comments:

Blogger The Wizened Wizard said...

I knew a couple (Grace and Ray) who had four kids. Their son Tom would occasionally be a wise-guy, and his mother would say, "Ray, speak to that boy!" And of course Ray would say, "Hi Tom."

The son would then say, "Did you call me, Dad?" and father would reply, "No, I called you Tom."

It's when you get to the stage of finishing each other's sentences that you could get into real trouble...

January 17, 2007 1:01 PM  
Blogger russkal said...

I wonder if she came with Peter North?

January 17, 2007 3:09 PM  
Blogger whimsicalnbrainpan said...

LOL! That sounds like something I'd say.

January 17, 2007 4:39 PM  
Blogger Meander said...

lol...now you do know how to make a porn star name right? you take the first pet you owned and then the first street you have lived on. for example...my porn star name is fluffy niagra!

January 17, 2007 5:10 PM  
Blogger Craig D said...

Trixie Dale - Mine

Duke Sumner - Wife

Hey, that's great! Thanks for the tip Fluffy!

=======================
wizard: That sounds like something straight out of the Jack Lemmon / Robbie Benson movie "Tribute!"

January 17, 2007 5:18 PM  
Blogger Dorky Dad said...

Man, my wife would smack me with the phone.

No she wouldn't. She'd just sigh and pick up the phone. But it sounds better if I say that she'd smack me. My wife isn't a smacker.

January 17, 2007 11:47 PM  
Blogger The Wizened Wizard said...

Brownie Scottsville... ?

Can I try a later pet and street: Lucky DePaul... Sounds like a gambler!

Or Lady Belvedere...

Back to the wise retorts: Raymond (you remember Raymond) once was asked by the new guy on the job if he needed to grease both sides of the skidder he had been told to lubricate. Raymond replied, "Nah. One side is fine. Then you'll only have to rebuild half of it when breaks down."

January 18, 2007 11:07 AM  

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